List Less

As someone who, on occasion, will post the five guys she's allow to cheat on her husband with, I like to make lists. I realize that one is a fun 'To Do" list. It does come with the difficult job of filling five slots. (Okay, I'm done with the horrible innuendo. Okay, now I'm done.)

During my attempt to declutter (unclutter?), I found two lists plaguing me. The first is my top five favorite movies. Of course this list is ever changing. But I came to a very comfortable conclusion of four. The fifth one alludes me. I don't want it to just be filled with some movie I enjoyed recently. Then again, I don't watch these movies every other day and I wonder if the found memories of only a few times is clouding my judgement. This is, after all, my top five favorite movies of all time.

The hardest thing is that I put it on a Post-It and I feel as though I can't throw it out until I can complete the list. That said, I need to stop the crazy when I can. Here are my top four favorite movies. Number one is my claimed favorite and the rest are in release date order.

1) Hot Fuzz
2) Tropic Thunder
3) The Cabin in the Woods
4) The Lego Movie

Interestingly, I thought of two movies I might want to add as I typed this. The recent "cloud my judgement" movie Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping and Much Ado About Nothing (2012). For the latter, I skip so much of it and get to the parts I love. That can't be criteria for favorite. I do that with shitty romantic movies, so why does this one stand out? The stellar cast? The amazing use of Shakespearean language in modern times? My evolving crush on Fran Kranz? The concern that the first time I saw it, I feared Joss Whedon would change the story and kill some people? (Definitely not that one.)

For now I leave number five blank and see what my memory bring back to me, or what Hollywood brings to me.

Now as for my to do list, many, many years ago (2011ish?), I starting making a list of movies I had to see.

1) Hannah
2) Sunshine
3) Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
4) The Cabin in the Woods
5) The Raid: Redemption
6) Tucker & Dale vs. Evil
7) Friends With Kids
8) 21 Jump Street
9) Moneyball
10) Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol
11) Captain America: The First Avenger
12) There Will Be Blood
13) No Country For Old Men

I have seen all but one. After finally forcing myself to see No Country For Old Men, I now have the dread of homework with There Will Be Blood. It was on Nextflix for a while and I still couldn't pull the trigger. I've had bad luck with Oscar movies. I will see it though, damn it.

And then there will be a new list that develops. But it will be in head. Because as I stare at this Post-It and scrap paper with letterhead of a job I left two years ago with an address that is no longer correct, I know not to bind myself anymore. I have not crossed off one list nor finished writing the other. They will go into the paper recycling (hippie, I know) as I move on. And then I will watch Two Weeks Notice for the first time (please don't ask).

Top Five Fears

High Fidelity was and still is a favorite movie of mine. It may be difficult to watch again since it is over fifteen years old, but so much still resonates with me. Right now, I have this going through my brain:

“You’re making something. You – the critic, the professional appreciator – put something new into the world. And the second one of those things gets sold, you’re officially a part of it.”

I have been bouncing back and forth with an idea for a podcast. It won't change the world. In fact because my expectations are so low, it won't really do anything. But it will be for fun, for me, and be put out into the world. Eventually. Now I just need to get my ideas on paper and my voice on tape. Or digital tape. Wish me luck.

Celebrity Sighing #For Van Gogh!

So it finally happened and The Film Vault had their live show. Hell yeah, I was going to go and represent the 8%. And I decided to spend extra for the VIP experience. This led me to finally getting to meet Anderson and Logan. Bryan was also there, but between Laughs For Bald Bryan, the numerous live Adam Carolla Shows, and his book signing, he is safely crossed off my list. 

Oh man, I can safely say that Anderson has no on mic persona. He is chatty and brash and it was great to meet him. He was even concerned that he insulted me and backpedaled and apologized as if I was a faceless listener. It was interesting but also made me like him more. The episode will come out as a premium one eventually and I will happily purchase it. 

The TCL Chinese Theater is beautiful and it would be amazing to see a movie there again. I did see Panic Room years ago, but that's what happens when you don't live there. I did get start struck by the set up for the new Alice in Wonderland premier even though it was empty of celebrities, but full of tourists. It is sort of fun, but it dies down quickly when you get struck by stick shock next. All in all, I had a wonderful time and even got to meet Miss Movies 2.0. Yeah, good times.

Celebrity Sighting #Sketchfest 2016

(Note: This post was started on February 21, 2016 and was finished on April 25, 2016.)

I almost cried this year. I laughed a lot, of course but this year was something a bit more.

Naturally, I immensely enjoyed myself while watching The Walhberg Solution unfold before my lucky eyes. Solving the world's problems with Mark were Tom Leykis (James Adomian), Macklemore (Jon Daly), Erica Rhodes, and Michael Caine (Kenny Stevenson).

You're welcome.

Watching SklarBro Country(County) with again a slew of personalities, mainly Nicolas Cage (Kenny Stevenson) working up the crowd was a sight to behold. I recommend you subscribe and get access to these two podcasts immediately.

And a bonus Moshe Kasher.

The big deal this is year was seeing Dr. Katz live. When sitting in the front row of this show I was able to pinpoint my love of comedy came from this man and his animated show. The introduction of so many brilliant comedic minds and their hilarious bits was the beginning for me. And to see live the banter between him and his son (H John Benjamin) and his patients brought in my his assistant Laura(Laura Silverman) was such a treat.

Then there were the actual patients: Janeane Garofalo, Andy Kindler, Maria Bamford, The Sklar Brothers, and surprise guest Zach Galifianakis. It was an amazing moment and I was truly sad when his trademark music came to tell us that time was up. Thank you Dr. Katz.

And thank you Twitter.

Don't Go Breaking My Darcy

I have been stuck in bed with a back problem. I am grateful I can make it to and from the bathroom by my own power. Most people would consider days in bed with a phone a vacation, but all I could think was this was going to make the rest of my body suck as much as my back.

I have no new ideas and do not like to venture out into finding new entertainment that could potentially be a waste of my time. That said, I went back into the realm of the 1995 BBC mini series Pride and Prejudice on a tiny screen on YouTube. That was followed by clips galore of the 2005 movie version. I did brave the theater months ago to be one of the five people that saw Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. I also happen to have a parallel obsession with the movie Austenland. 

Yes, I have a non back problem as well. I refer to this as my Lady Porn. You see the slow burn of a blossoming romance and like Jaws, your imagination fills in the blanks better than the production can. Granted, I hated this book in high school because I missed the point. I was angry feminist chick and any of this crap about marriage and a woman's place needed to be shut down. Now I am a card carrying member of the Darcy Fan Club. I just happen to like Matthew Macfadyen's portray the best. 

Don't get me wrong, he's hot too.

The marketing of this version is not the best and my first viewing did not give me a good impression. They watered down the asshole aspects of Mr. Darcy and instead made him just quiet but misunderstood. If he existed in modern high school, his only flaw would be resting bitch face. I related to that whole-heartily.

I did find some other Austen knock offs and managed to get through a Mormon infused version. You'd think it would work given it's Austen translated to modern times, but it was pretty terrible. Don't get me started on the Hallmark flavor taking place in the backdrop of dog shows. 

Here is the most important lesson: putting together YouTube clips and saying you watched a movie is no way to go through life. Also, if you are over thirty, don't sleep on an air mattress.

Maurice Damon, Space Cowboy

Of course this is not a comedy. There was too much of the budget spent on action sequences to make this a comedy. The dialogue with funny parts had to keep us from killing ourselves. Which is how I felt when I watched Gravity. Sorry Academy, except I'm not.

There is an extra layer of hilarity of The Martian, though. It isn't very creative, but much like how in (spoiler!) Interstellar, I had to stop myself from screaming MATT DAMON! when he was on the screen, I had this in my head the whole time. (In a semi-related note, I asked my niece if she had seen Interstellar and she asked if that was the one with Matt Damon. I paused and decided that I would attempt to preserve the Matt Damon in this movie and said you're thinking of Matthew McConaughey. He also cannot have his name said correctly and it came out as McConaugHAAAAY!)

 

Gets me every time.

Yes, I am a child and think of Team America whenever I see Matt Damon. If you see him on Jimmy Kimmel Live, you know he has a very good sense of humor. However, if I ever see the man in person and I scream without thinking, he has every right to punch me in the face.

Big Old Jet Airliner

In an attempt to be okay with getting on a plane, I reminded myself that I successfully flew to celebrate my niece's graduation on the other side of the country not too long ago and the trip was well beyond worth it. I had the idea floating in my head that I love my family more than I hate flying.

I test that again tomorrow and I have to remind myself that I love my best friend and her family more than I hate flying. I need to get away every once in a while. I was crying due to the stress of being sick and leaving my comfy space. Also, I hate leaving behind my beloved dog. I then though of my best friend leaving behind her childhood state and her family to start a new life in a more affordable place to raise her family. I need to grow up for a few days and remember the sting of travel does not compare to the joy of being together. And I should not puke when I see the huge house she can afford.

While battling this crap, it occurred to me that it is dangerous having so much importance wrapped up into so few things in my life. "Eggs in basket" as my husband pointed out. He, of course is one of the main eggs. I have to find this balance of reaching out to get more in my life and not running overboard to be an idiot that wants to master all the things. For now, I just need to pack and get to the airport in one piece.