This week I needed to cry. Badly. I had overworked my angry muscles. I needed to express myself and have a catharsis.
But
didn't want to cheat. If that even makes sense. On Monday I went down a
rabbit hole of YouTube clips. I landed on scene in Avengers Endgame
where (spoiler alert) the ashes of the dead come back in a Dr. Strange
portal. There was a riveting moment of seeing their success and the
cavalry return that gets me. Tiny streams came to my eyes.
Not
good enough though. I refuse to allow this Marvel movie to make me cry.
A movie must be straight up animated and I'm watching a mother die
(fuck you, The Land Before Time) or Pixar montage of a couple's life
together (fuck you, first twenty minutes of Up) for me to accept my
tears.
That's
right, I had to earn a catharsis. I've managed to easily laugh to try
and ease my burdens. I think my body caught on. Funny TV shows aren't
working anymore. Time with friends have me smiling, but I'm burned out
on mild contented laughter. I think I need an angry cry.
My brain took over and decided I would not get The Chainsmokers & Coldplay's Something Just Like This.
Then I looked up what it meant. I appreciate this thoughtful analysis about it and how it's just beautiful at face value.
I
don't know why it happened. The song is still in my head. I'll let it
stay there for now. Thank goodness I like it. I remain on my quest for
peace. But not like the Superman in the song. Oh great, I can't just let
a pop culture reference go, can I?
